A Scene

Do you see this lovely girl pictured? Well, you've been decieved by her pleasant looks and soft speaking manner. Here's what she was planning on doing tonight:

A Scene:
Jennifer is sitting on her patio/driveway in Austin, Texas. She is on a black lawn chair wearing a t-shirt and black pencil-line skirt with white boots (how very Austin). Next to her chair is a pitcher of Strawberry Margaritas, and in her hand is a red wine glass half full of a delicious strawberry margarita, into which she added an extra shot...for kicks.

Out walks Jennifer's houseguest:

Houseguest: Jennifer, there you are. I just had an awesome (Jennifer throws her margarita at the houseguest without even looking). Ow! Jennifer, what the fuck?!?

Jennifer: You know what Houseguest? Napoleon Bonaparte gave up Islam because he loved his foreskin.

Pause. Jennifer Stares out at the park with a thousand year old gaze, somehow a combination of otherworldy knowingness and the bitterness of sixteen failed marriages.

Jennifer: Yeah, that's right. So, you want another margarita?

Houseguest stands bewildered and walks back into the house and naps further.

And Scene!

Also, I'm sitting in the sun and i'm a little dehydrated.

Liza With a Z

So I was thinking about Liza Minnelli this morning during Criminal Procedure. We got bogged down in defining an "interrogation," and my mind wandered, as it often does. In no way did I expect my mind to wander in the direction of Liza Minnelli. Seriously.

What at 8:15 this could lead me to her? Is today an optimistic day in which I'm in love with love? Is everything sparkling and fabulous to my eyes? Or is everyone I see somehow associated with a musical about Nazi Germany? Is my mother a fabulous anomoly?

I don't know what it is, but I hope that everyone can have a Liza Minnelli kind of day every noe and then.

A Liza Haiku:

Sequins & Drama
She Wears both Naturally
Except David Gest

Who Should Joey Potter Choose?

Does Joey choose Dawson or Pacey? Is it a matter of timing? Is Joey stupid for just not moving outside of the Capeside scope? What about hot professor? Ok, there's not hot professor here...but there could be. Ok, not at my school, per se, but there could be a hot professor out there.

It seems that Pacey has won out for the time being, complete with mention of domestic partnerships and co-habitation. And Joey already had that with Dawson , at least as much as Dawson was capable of.

Joey needs a drink.

Oh, and there will be no Tom Cruise resolution.

Texan Hiakus

A dear friend of mine was kind of enough to drive me to San Antonio from Austin, but made sure to feul me with mimosas for the road. What happened was creative response to the environment into which we were thrust. It resembled what is best perhaps described as the 3rd Ring of Hell, in between the 2nd (reserved for dry cappuccino drinkers) and the 4th (cranky white men who use the word "chafe").

Here are some creative gems:

ironic mustache
tight black jeans and converse shoes
beat up in high school

david has the soul
jennifer has his money
now we can't hear well

jesus fucking christ
it's all disposable shit
large scale soul sucker**

giraffes in texas
no matter what, it's not right
what a travesty.***

blow me new braunfels
and blow gauche caviar too
we don't like strip malls

i get it texas
you like your flags huge and high
compensating much?

**walmart distribution center
***south texas "a wild and vivid land"?

The Most Exciting Thing Ever, Vol. 1

This is Mika, and I love him. Thankfully I downed a Long Island Iced Tea and worked up some liquid courage to run back and take this picture (well, harranged Jennifer into taking it). This is, officially, my most prized possession of the week. I was in the front row for the concert, which was a little weird b/c we were only 2 feet away from him. I'm sure his sense of space was a little violated, but for a good cause (namely satisfying this boy's crush). After the Fratellis (who rock in a very Franz Ferdinand way) I dragged Jennifer to the front, mostly against her wishes and against the wishes of our very sore/tired bodies that had been standing all day. His performance was great, but brief, and he was wearing lavendar courduroy...do with that what you will. He sang "Grace Kelly" which pretty much made SXSW for me. He was swarmed with Austin's Gay Mafia and rabid Perez Hilton readers (I fell somewhere in the middle), but still I got to meet him and take a picture and make some comment (really, can't remember details as i was overwhelmed with adrenaline) about the Scissor Sisters. He smiled and I got a close hug and put my arm around his waist. That's right. 1st base in under 30 seconds. Awesome. This was followed by a cool goodbye, a quick walk out of the bar, and lots of screaming as Jennifer looked on in confusion. Also met P*rez H*lton a few minutes before Mika, but that's not very interesting comparatively. Alarming, yes. Interesting, no. Fat, yes. Striped, yes. Star-struck, no. And Jessica Simpson's dad was somewhere around. Weird. But really, the point is that i met Mika who has the distinction/blessing/curse of being big in England. Love him, and so do the Brits.

It Has Begun

This is the blog that I will keep. I've left many blogs in my wake, victims of my lazy nature. This new blog, however, will last. At least I feel that way 2 minutes into the blogging experience. We'll see 5 minutes down the road. For now I promise good anecdotes, haiku, informative updates & lots of pictures of the cats! Hooray!

Things happening: Just got home from Austin & SXSW. Still feeling a little hungover, but that's probably due to the unexpected Houston layover that left me hungry and cranky (yes, those two feelings were intertwined). It'll take me some time to organize my thoughts of everything that happened, but it is forthcoming and I promise entertainment (primarily being descriptions of whatever the fuck P*r*z H*lt*n was wearing). And there will be Mika. Me fawning over Mika. And my picture with Mika. And Jennifer's reaction to whatever the fuck P*r*z was wearing. And Japanese novelty acts, including a psychadelic marching band, and a 10 piece, all girl, brass/hip-hop band. It was weird.

In the mean time, I have to look studious in my Lexis position (which is the best job ever, hanging out in the library and fixing the printer). Also preparing for 2 interviews this week. Time to put on my fancy lawyer pants.